Where from Here

December 31, 2017

I haven’t written anything since November 19.  There are many excuses.  The November and December holidays happened.  We had guests for Thanksgiving and for Christmas. Robert’s grandma stayed with us for three weeks.  Robert sister came for two-week long visit. Robert’s dad experienced sudden turbulence at work which somehow affected the whole family.

However, the main reason for avoiding these pages is both simple and complex. It is simple because it can be expressed in a few words, “I was confused and lost”. It was complex, because the reasons for my confusion were intricate and multifaceted.

I don’t know where Robert is heading. I don’t know where he is now. I don’t know who will be there for him besides us, his parents and, to some degree, his sister.

It seems that Robert functions differently at his program than he does at home.  Many things I teach him at home do not carry over to his program.  I can guess reasons for some of the differences in performances in varied settings. I understand why he made errors in adding fractions when he was at his program, while he doesn’t make mistakes at home. But I cannot explain other behaviors – like stealing candies or cookies in his program.  At home Robert shows restrain and doesn’t reach for those candies or cookies which are included in his lunches or snacks. In the program, however, it seems like he cannot help himself but to go on scavenger hunt during any transition time.

Even when I know reasons for those differences I am still unable to make Robert immune to the factors that confuse him when I am not around. I also cannot write a manual that would account for all the possible situations Robert might find himself in needing a very specific support.  Well, I could attempt to concoct a guidebook dealing with some of the situations, but who would read it in those precise moments when instruction is needed?

It would be much more suitable to write a guidebook for Robert.  The manual HE would consult with when confused or lost or which HE would offer to the people who are supposed to assist him in his daily endeavors.

Robert still needs a tool that would let him carry a skill from one setting to another, from one person to a different one.  A tool that would let him understand the essence of skill that is not dependent on the setting.  And of course Robert also needs another tool that would let him adjust behavior to fit the setting.

To find, design, or develop such tools I need to go back to writing every day, well, almost every day.